Roland

Newfies are so smart! This about says it all !!! American tourist asks a Newfoundlander: "Why do Scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats?" To which the Newfoundlander replies: "If they fell forwards they'd still be in the fook hing' boat." Cocktail Conversation A woman arrived at a party and while scanning the guests, spotted an attractive man standing alone. She approached him, smiled and said, "Hello. My name is Carmen." "That's a beautiful name," he replied. "Is it a family name?" "No," she replied. As a matter of fact I gave it to myself. It represents the things that I enjoy the most - cars and men. Therefore, I chose "Carmen. "What's your name?" He answered "B.J. Titsengolf." The following advice, given by Dr. Oz, makes a lot of sense and is important for all to know: The only portals of entry are the nostrils and mouth/throat. In a global epidemic of this nature, it's almost impossible to avoid coming into contact with H1N1 in spite of all precautions. Contact with H1N1 is not so much of a problem as proliferation is. While you are still healthy and not showing any symptoms of H1N1 infection, in order to prevent proliferation, aggravation of symptoms and development of secondary infections, some very simple steps, not fully highlighted in most official communications, can be practiced (instead of focusing on how to stock N95 or Tamiflu): 1. Frequent hand-washing (well highlighted in all official communications). 2. "Hands-off-the-face" approach. Resist all temptations to touch any part of face (unless you want to eat or bathe.) 3. *Gargle twice a day with warm salt water (use Listerine or Hydrogen Peroxide if you don't trust salt). *H1N1 takes 2-3 days after initial infection in the throat/ nasal cavity to proliferate and show characteristic symptoms. Simple gargling prevents proliferation. In a way, gargling with salt water has the same effect on a healthy individual that Tamiflu has on an infected one. Don't underestimate this simple, inexpensive and powerful preventative method. 4. Similar to 3 above, *clean your nostrils at least once every day with warm salt water, or hydrogen peroxide. *Not everybody may be good at Jala Neti or Sutra Neti (very good Yoga asanas to clean nasal cavities), but *blowing the nose softly once a day and swabbing both nostrils with cotton buds dipped in warm salt water is very effective in bringing down viral population.* 5. *Boost your natural immunity with foods that are rich in Vitamin C (Amla and other citrus fruits). *If you have to supplement with Vitamin C tablets, make sure that it also has Zinc to boost absorption. 6. *Drink as much of warm liquids (tea, coffee, etc) as you can. *Drinking warm liquids has the same effect as gargling, but in the reverse direction. They wash off proliferating viruses from the throat into the stomach where they cannot survive, proliferate or do any harm. Pass this on to your entire e-list. You never know who might pay attention to it - and STAY ALIVE because of it. This is a true story. The following scene took place on a BA flight between Johannesburg and London. A White woman, about 50 years old, was seated next to a Black man. Obviously for some reason she was disturbed by this, she called the air Hostess. "Madam, what is the matter," the Hostess asked. ‘You obviously do not see it then?" she responded. ‘You placed me next to a Black man. I do not agree to sit next to someone from such a repugnant group. Give me an alternative seat’. ‘Be calm please’, the Hostess replied ‘Almost all the places on this flight are taken. I will go to see if another seat is available’. The Hostess went away and then came back a few minutes later. ‘Madam, just as I thought, there are no other available seats in the Economy class. I spoke to the Captain and he informed me that there are also no seats in the Business class. All the same, we still have one seat in the First class’. Before the woman could say anything, the Hostess continued: ‘It is not usual for our company to permit someone from the Economy class to sit in the First class. However, given the circumstances, the Captain feels that it would be scandalous to make someone sit next to someone so disgusting’. She turned to the Black Gentleman, and said, "Therefore, Sir, if you would like to, please collect your hand luggage, a seat awaits you in First Class." At that moment, the other passengers who were shocked by what they had just witnessed stood up and applauded. HOW SMART IS YOUR RIGHT FOOT? This is hysterical. You have to try this. It is absolutely true. I guess there are some things that the brain cannot handle. You have to try this please, it takes 2 seconds. It is from an orthopaedic surgeon. This will confuse your mind and you will keep trying over and over again to see if you can outsmart your foot, but, you can't. It is pre-programmed in your brain. 1. While sitting at your desk in front of your computer, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles. 2. Now, while doing this, draw the number '6' in the air with your right hand. Your foot will change direction. I told you so! And there's nothing you can do about it! You and I both know how stupid it is, but before the day is done you are going to try it again, if you've not already done so.

Garlic in water stops them drinking a lot.... they hate it and drink just enough. So again it is a two fold effect. One they cut back on water - to much of that and you may well have trouble, and two, they are getting a great preventive.

Rr.... you wanna see their reaction when you do it with a Blow Torch lol ;D ;D

At least you have it to flow lol ;D ;D

Sorry Jimmy missed your post.

Is when you fly HENS only, female is a widow.. A cock bird - a Male is a Widower. Do you mean Widowerhood?

Barley can - and I feed barley nigh all the time, sometimes with Wheat and a proportion of maples / tic beans. The good thing is it is a naturual blood purifier. Bad thing it lacks a fair bit, and has low proportions on other essential properties. This can lead to two things. 1. overwieght because they over eat, if allowed, to compensate what they are missing. 2. One certainly doesn't want any toxin poison that can occur with too mauch barley.

Well it is fine when keeping fish. Many aquarist do as such, as indeed I did. The reason was two fold. One to keep in trim wieght wise and two it meant they scaverage for any food on bottom etc. So the tank benefitted as they was nowt there to pollute. BUT it was, and is for conditioning the fish, indeed there wasn't much left to scavage any road. Was a time when prisoners were fed 3 days food... 3 days bread and water and one day nothing. This again was also found to be be good health wise... Again many people, well not so many lol now - do fast one day a week to cleanse out the system. It IS ad has been done for a few years now regards pigeons. Again to cleanse the system. Yes of course many slans and angles and view will be prevalent on this topic. Personally I can only see good from it. JMO.

Interesting post that. Obviosly the Pigeon Paper atracts more views I'd imagine, be hard to actually say which percentage buying wise was best I guess.

Cats,I have a real dislike for them but be careful. http://www.cats.org.uk/catcare/leaflets/EG10-Catsandthelaw.pdf Lindsay. Thats good then, rcognising their rights as animals, and protection. By the very same token it must that they then can recognise all Animals / birds / etc. as properties etc. Especially when pigeons have rins of proven ownership.

Husband asks his wife:How many men have you slept with? Wife proudly replies: Only you darling, with all the others, I was awake! Six retired Jewish Floridian fellows were playing poker in the condo clubhouse when Meyer loses £500 on a single hand, clutches his chest and drops dead at the table. Showing respect for their fallen comrade, the other five continue playing, but standing up. At the end of the game, Finkelstein looks around and asks, "So, who's gonna tell his vife?" They cut the cards.. Goldberg picks the low card and has to carry the news. They tell him to be discreet, be gentle, don't make a bad situation any worse. "Discreet? I'm the most discreet person you'll ever meet. Discretion is my middle name. Leave it to me." Goldberg goes over to the Meyer's condo and knocks on the door. The wife answers through the door and asks what he wants? Goldberg declares: "Your husband just lost £500 in a poker game and is afraid to come home." "Tell him to drop dead!" yells the wife. "I'll go tell him." says Goldberg. =

Lol ;D ;D ;D I believe I implied when I get the cash like. If not, then I say so now lol

Firstly CATS do not have a license to roam. That is a over well used myth. Cat owners ARE responcible for any damage, carnage, killing etc. to your property / live stock etc. etc. Was first put wise on the BBC 'Ask the Judge'. Have since been reinforce both privately and publically. Indeed such as Alf Jones and many more warn any new house holders to keep their cats away from his gardens / lofts etc. Often asked how etc. And simple reply is 'Don't know, nor care, but they will lose their lives if they stray onto Mine'! Further he asks 'Just what and why do you think you can just let your cats out to foul, stick out our gardens and kill on my property'. He has even knocked on doors and showed them dead cats and says' I'm good for my word.... Keep your cats off my property'! cat owners can and have been sued for their cats killing rabbits, pigeons etc. That is the truth of the matter and myths don't / won't stand up in court. Others just catch and remove others cats. But that I guess is illegal :-/ :o

Shed full of Chapion pigeons and bespoked lofts.... as many as you like! Why / How you may ask. Well went to my PM's and found this.... just new I was a lucky one lol Dear Good Friend, I contacted you,after so many prayers and fasting towards your profile.I choosed you as a good & honest person,whom i can confide all my trust with,in this urgent business transaction. Let me firstly introduce myself, My name is Linda Andrew,from Coted'Ivoire. The only child of late Mr Joseph Andrew. My mother died when i was a kid and My late father is the owner of J&T Cocoa Industries. But my father died recently and he was poisoned by his brother and before his sudden death,He called me privately and told me of huge amount of money ( us$10,500,000.00. ) Which he deposited in a BANK,here in my country and used my name as the next of kin,as her only child. Now,i am Orphan of mother and father and I want you to help me out, in providing a bank account,where this total funds, (us$10,500,000.00.) Ten Million Five Hundred Thousand United State Dollars, which my late father deposited in the bank with my name as the next of kin,will be transfered into,over there in your country,for my investment purposes in your country with you. Also you will advice me on a good and profitable investment,which i can set-up in your country,after the successful transfer. Please, i am honourably soliciting for your kind and urgent assistance in the following ways: 1) To provide a bank account where this money will be transfered into. 2) To serve as the guardian of these fund ,since i am 22 years old. 3)To make arrangement for me in your country to continue my educational career and to procure to me a residential permit in your country. Sincerely speaking from my heart, i am willing to offer you 15% of this my total funds, as a reward for your assistance in helping me out. Not only this,you will also be my oversea guidian and take care of all the companies or any business venture,which i will set-up in your country. Anyway,urgently reply me rightnow, for more details about me and about this my total funds i wants to transfer into your bank account , if you are really ready and interested to help me out in this assistance. I am eagerly waiting to hear from you now. Thanks for your assistance and take care and also may God bless you as you help me out. Email me at linda_024andrew@yahoo.com Your new good friend, Linda Andrew Of course I've Emailed all my bank details and Pin numbers :P ;D ;D ;D ;D

Always use to use garden lime. Does away with many nasties and loverly fresh smell. One should dab / rub it in with a rag like. A slight damp one regardless of IB's taboo's on E Coli etc. Mostly in later days I would mix like a think paint and paint every thing. Now pne can get a Agri Lime, sold in 25 kg bags, for approx £5, It does everything good that lime should do, but doesn't lift when birds flap wings, thus eliminating all that unpleasantness associated with regular lime. I've often scrape out then brush in lime. Many of us, most in one club swear by putting a Table spoon full in the drinkers, well stirred and left over nigh for the birds to have next day. I / we believe this has the calming effect and is a good proventive against Y/B sickness.

Is angry at having his photo took ... Understandable that obviously. Not many that ugly stand still even for it lol :P ;D ;D ;D

Yes if wanting to keep an eye out of the window for cats etc. REmember you must have the roof sloping downwards to you .... So you can see if any thing is on the loft ... many have looked and saw nowt, because the cat was at back end out of view.. Can have a gutter covered with 1/2 inch wire so the birds can't peck in it.

That's just what I thought lol .... Soon have a secret Society where we can pass along name eh! :P ;D ;D ;D Mind would take ages, and soon get fed up with writing myself eh!

best on the roof. Very good thing is a sky light or such.

Love those Church Ladies.. They're Back! Those wonderful Church Bulletins! Thank God for church ladies with typewriters.These sentences (with all the BLOOPERS) actually appeared in church bulletins or were announced in church services: -------------------------- The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals. -------------------------- The sermon this morning: 'Jesus Walks on the Water.' The sermon tonight: 'Searching for Jesus.' -------------------------- Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands. -------------------------- Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say 'Hell' to someone who doesn't care much about you. -------------------------- Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help. -------------------------- Miss Charlene Mason sang 'I will not pass this way again,' giving obvious pleasure to the congregation. -------------------------- For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs. -------------------------- Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get. -------------------------- Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days. -------------------------- A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow. -------------------------- At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be 'What Is Hell?' Come early and listen to our choir practice -------------------------- Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones. -------------------------- Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children. -------------------------- Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered. -------------------------- The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility. -------------------------- Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow. -------------------------- The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon. -------------------------- This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin. -------------------------- Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B. S. Is done. -------------------------- The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the Congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday. -------------------------- Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door. ------------------------- The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Church basement Friday at 7 PM.. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy. -------------------------- Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance. -------------------------- The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new campaign slogan last Sunday: 'I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours'.

Don't for a minute Ronnie think two rounds will harm any fit and healthy birds. Mind can be, and most likely is, anything but Phar.

Yep, I'd mate them to the same hen. At different times of course. Mind that works a darn site better with hens mated to the same cock bird

Allows them to stand, walk slowly, but no balance to fight with. They just fall over and give up. Indeed others all settle down too.

Well as for me, I am all for naturual immunisation. However there are times, whether we like it or not. Or whether in most cases we have caused it, which of course many have. There comes a time when our birds need our help. They thought Polio was erradicated till they stopped jabbing. Soon put paid to that when it quickly came rife again. That is, and has been the most effective jab of all time. Many preventives don't stop a bird from catching, as many still do and become carrierss, but the consequencies can be a lot lot less. Having had Samonella / Pharhoid let me tell you it is devasting. One bird with it can handle a treat and win in a show pen.... and infect the loft! Hence why I have stripped my whole loft down. Every single inch has been blow torched well. Will have two / three coats of paint. Nest boxes have been soaked in Bleach. Dried and now will be blowed torched throughly. Then varnished. Am discarding my nest bowls and going back to two bricks. Yes well bleached and blowed torched. Vikron will be used every scrape. Why? :-/ Because it is one hell of a thing to get shot off. AND now well shot off I won't ever let up in the slightest to maintain a tight run ship to eliminate any and every chance of ever having it again! Now as for anyone vaccinating against such disasters :-/ ... we all are custodians of our birds and have to do wha we think is best for our birds and that is ALL inmates. Will be debating next Monday a to whether I shall vaccinate... seems likely I will be.