Roland

on here, is going to John's Formula sale at Bedworth.

The missis has got the hump with me :-/ :o All because I didn't open the car door for her! :B It's not my fault ... I just panicked and swam to the surface! ;D ;D ;D

I'm taking that £20 I scrounged of the family. Who knows, I might get a stock loft sorted out lol ;D ;D ;D Mind it would certainly be a good start eh!

Well worth a case of beer eh! ;D ;D

I agree with most of Owens' post above. In a round - a - bout way he cracks the nut sweetl. IT is those that do as he - and nigh all of us - see every time an issue of debate arises. THE MEMBERS boo hoo it and expect A. Wealthy knowleagable buisness's give up their time etc. and get their staff to do and them fund it. If it costs a £1 forget it, and never vote / attend meetings / yet are strong and forceful in 'Corridor politic! As much as the pro's and con still rave about the ET's for example, the RPRA did as they did - rightly or wrongly - take the 'Bull by the Horns' so to speak and implement it! It would never have got in in our life time -I'm 23 near year lol ;D - And that is where the crux of the matter lyes I believe. If only 'Openess' was allowed to prevail and members vote for the GOOD of the sport as a whole, and not in own self - often misbegotten - interests, then this sport in the UK would have astounded in leaps and bounds long ago. Too many time we all hear 'It's alright for them ....(Whatever ............. they would want it'!

A man came home from work and found his three children outside, still in their pyjamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and 20 wrappers strewn all around the front yard. The door of his wife's car was open, and so the front door to the house and there was no sign of the dog. Proceeding into the entry, he found an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked over, and the throw rug was wadded against one wall. In the front room the TV was loudly blaring a cartoon channel, and the family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing. In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilled on the counter, the fridge door was open wide, dog food was spilled on the floor a broken glass lay under the table, and a small pile of sand was spread by the back door. He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife. He was worried she might be ill, or that something serious had happened. He was met with a small trickle of water as it made its way out the bathroom door. As he peered inside he found wet towels, scummy soap and more toys strewn over the floor. Miles of toilet paper lay in a heap and toothpaste had been smeared over the mirror and walls. As he rushed to the bedroom, he found his wife still curled up in the bed in her pyjamas, reading a novel. She looked up at him, smiled, and asked how his day went. He looked at her bewildered and asked, 'What happened here today?' She again smiled and answered, 'You know every day when you come home from work and you ask me what in the world I do all day?' Yes,' was his incredulous reply. She answered, 'Well, today I didn't do it.' Send this page to a woman. This is Priceless Seems like her normal day lol ;D ;D Just ducking lol 8)

A man in a hot air balloon realized he was lost. He reduced altitude and spotted a woman below. He descended a bit more and shouted, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago but I don’t know where I am." The woman below replied, "You're in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You're between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude." "You must be in Information Technology," said the balloonist. "I am," replied the woman, "how did you know?" "Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is probably technically correct, but I've no idea what to make of your information and the fact is, I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help at all. If anything, you've delayed my trip." The woman below responded, "You must be in Management." "I am," replied the balloonist, "but how did you know?" "Well," said the woman, "you don't know where you are or where you’re going. You have risen to where you are, due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise, which you've no idea how to keep, and you expect people beneath you to solve your problems. The fact is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow, it's my f ** king fault."

THE HAIRCUT A young boy had just received his driver's permit and asked his father if they could discuss his use of the car. His father said he'd make a deal with his son. 'You bring your grades up from a C to a B Average, study your Bible a little, get your hair cut and we'll talk about the car.' The boy thought about that for a moment, decided he'd settle for the offer and they agreed on it. After about six weeks his father said, 'Son, I've been real proud. You brought your grades up and I've observed that you have been studying your Bible, but I'm real disappointed you didn't get your hair cut.' The young man paused a moment then said, 'You know, Dad, I've been thinking about that, and I've noticed in my studies of the Bible that Samson had long hair, John the Baptist had long hair, Moses had long hair and there's even a strong argument that Jesus had long hair.'To this his father replied, 'Did you also notice that they all walked everywhere they went?'

You know, and it may well be the case if not 985 of it, that THEY know that the majority of members aren't interested, and certainly would be interested in dipping a hand in a pocket to shell out even a quid. So the question beggars 'Just why should the RPRA and it'd Regional area strife to do, and even raise an interest in any thing that they know the MEMBERS will Boo - Hoo and shout down :-/ :o ? It isn't the committee etc. it is the members. Just look at some of the replies on here. Yes! As always we will hear the moans and whinges. Won't hear the patter of feet going to club meetings, let alone Fed or Regional ones. This is not just the RPRA but EVERY other concern that SENDS a ballot paper to EVERY member! Indeed, one only has to look at the times votes are counted on ANY subject and change.... The very vast majority won't even send a vote in for or against, let alone abstain. Mind one hears the moans if unpopular decisions are made that AFFECT them.

d og Logic The reason a dog has so many friends is hat he wags his tail instead of his tongue. If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. -Ben Williams A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself. –Josh Billings The average dog is a nicer person than the average person. –Andy Rooney Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. – Franklin Jones If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man. – Mark Twain Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole. – Roger Caras If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then give him only two of them. -Phil Pastoret The reason I letting you read this, is for you to remember a dog can smaell a good person a mile away

Not starting another slant on this topic. But Jagre many hunts in the 70's and 80's had to import from Essex -as I know of - becuase 'huntwise' they were scare to say the least. Many of course had colonised towns etc. Won't spout other dispicable things they did etc. but they are now also, if not moreso a scour in towns big time now. Sure Mixy had a lot o do with it. But getting back on song, unfortunately most don't prepare a fox proof loft / coup etc. as they don't often see, let alone expect a raid, till it happens. Then of course it is devastating.

Good idea, maybe. Members would not even consider it. Yes pur and make soothing sounds.... But if ever it came to a vote they would simple say 'I would, but the others won''t, and never get even as far as being put up to vote on. Further the RPRA would put feelers out. The responce from memebrs feed back would mean thet thay would never even bother to try. Sad but true. indeed the only time you ever see member up and at it, and even telling their representives how to vote is if it is going to cost them a £1 or or so. £10 :o would see them purring that it's a good idea, bur won't vote for it as it will never get through. omitting that they will make sure it won't get through. JMO

Bake, I think you will find they kill as many as possible, then take as many as possible and bury them. They then will keep returning for the others. Yes they will bury the lot, and dig up at a later stage to eat.

As my mate, who sent it, sys couldn't happen in the USA. Nor here. Deffinately not in Austria as Julie Andrews is a swear word and held in very poor taste. So what if it is sentimental twaddle... it is a cockle warmer.

Baby's First Doctor Visit A woman and a baby were in the doctor's examining room, waiting for the doctor to come in for the baby's first exam. The doctor arrived, and examined the baby, checked his weight, saw it was a little low, and being a little concerned, asked if the baby was breast-fed or bottle-fed. ‘Breast-fed,’ she replied. ’Well, strip down to your waist,’ the doctor ordered. She did. He pinched her nipples, pressed, kneaded, and rubbed both breasts for a while in a very professional and detailed examination. Motioning to her to get dressed, the doctor said, ‘No wonder this baby is underweight. You don't h ave any milk.’ ’I know,’ she said, ‘I'm his' Grandma, but I'm glad I came’

Can't see anything wrong with that ! (evil)(evil)(evil) :X :X :X Ll ;D ;D

A husband sits quietly watching T.V when he hears the wife ask from the Kitchen. ‘What would you like, chicken, beef or lamb’? Surprised he answers ‘Beef would be fine love’ ‘Bogg off you your getting soup’ she snaps back ‘I was talking to the cat’.

Great birds from a great genuine fellow. Having said that, I must be missing something .... where is the Sale to be held again? :-/ Gosh have borrowed 20 qud off the family to set up a stock loft with them lol ;D ;D Mind they certainly would do that!

friends There are some gems in these, real LOL J Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was in her eighties and had never been married. She was admired for her sweetness and kindness to all. One afternoon, the Pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to take a seat while she prepared tea. As he sat facing her old Hammond organ, the young minister noticed a cut glass bowl sitting on top of it. The bowl was filled with water, and in the water floated, of all things, a condom! When she returned with tea and scones and they began to chat.The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and he could no longer resist. 'Miss Beatrice', he said, 'I wonder if you would tell me about this?' Pointing to the bowl. 'Oh, yes,' she replied, 'Isn't it wonderful? I was walking through the park a few months ago and I found this little package on the ground. The directions said to place it on the organ, keep it wet and that it would prevent the spread of disease. Do you know I haven't had the flu All winter.' A man and his wife were awakened at 3 A.M. by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push. 'Not a chance,' says the husband, 'it is 3:00 in the morning!' He slams the door and returns to bed. 'Who was that?' asked his wife. 'Just some drunk guy asking for a push,' he answers. 'Did you help him?' she asks. 'No, I did not, it is 3:00 in the morning and it is pouring down rain. 'Well, you have a short memory,' says his wife. 'Can't you remember about three months ago when we broke down, and those two guys helped us? I think you should help him, and you should be ashamed of yourself!' The man does as he is told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pouring rain. He calls out into the dark, 'Hello, are you still there?' 'Yes,' comes back the answer. 'Do you still need a push?' calls out the husband (soaking wet) 'Yes, please!' comes the reply from the dark. 'Where are you?' asks the husband.. 'Over here on the swing!' replied the drunk. Grandparents: 1. She was in the bathroom, putting on her makeup, under the watchful eyes of her young granddaughter, as she'd done many times before. After she applied her lipstick and started to leave, the little one said, "But Gramma, you forgot to kiss the toilet paper good-bye!" I will probably neverput lipstick on again without thinking about kissing the toilet paper good-bye... 2. My young grandson called the other day to wish me Happy Birthday. He asked me how old I was, and I told him, 62. My grandson was quiet for a moment, and then he asked, "Did you start at 1?" 3. After putting her grandchildren to bed, a grandmother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. Finally, she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with stern warnings. As she left the room, she heard the three-year-old say with a trembling voice, "Who was THAT?" 4. A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what her own childhood was like: "We used to skate outside on a pond I had a swing made from a tire; it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony.. We picked wild raspberries in the woods." The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this all in. At last she said, "I sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!" 5. My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know how you and God are alike?" I mentally polished my halo and I said, "No, how are we alike?'' "You're both old," he replied. 6. A little girl was diligently pounding away on her grandfather's word processor. She told him she was writing a story. "What's it about?" he asked. "I don't know," she replied. "I can't read." 7. I didn't know if my granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I decided to test her. I would point out something and ask what color it was. She would tell me and was always correct. It was fun for me, so I continued. At last, she headed for the door, saying, "Grandma, I think you should try to figure out some of these, yourself!" 8. When my grandson Billy and I entered our vacation cabin, we kept the lights off until we were inside to keep from attracting pesky insects. Still, a few fireflies followed us in. Noticing them before I did, Billy whispered, "It's no use Grandpa. Now the mosquitoes are coming after us with flashlights." 9... When my grandson asked me how old I was, I teasingly replied, "I'm not sure.." "Look in your underwear, Grandpa," he advised, "mine says I'm 4 to 6." 10. A second grader came home from school and said to her grandmother, "Grandma, guess what? We learned how to make babies today." The grandmother, more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool. "That's interesting," she said, "how do you make babies?" "It's simple," replied the girl. "You just change 'y' to 'i' and add 'es'.." 11. Children's Logic: "Give me a sentence about a public servant," said a teacher. The small boy wrote: "The fireman came down the ladder pregnant." The teacher took the lad aside to correct him. "Don't you know what pregnant means?" she asked. "Sure," said the young boy confidently. 'It means carrying a child." 12. A grandfather was delivering his grandchildren to their home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children started discussing the dog's duties. "They use him to keep crowds back," said one child. "No," said another. "He's just for good luck." A third child brought the argument to a close."They use the dogs," she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrants." 13. A 6-year-old was asked where his grandma lived. "Oh," he said, "she lives at the airport, and when we want her, we just go get her. Then, when we're done having her visit, we take her back to the airport." 14. Grandpa is the smartest man on earth! He teaches me good things, but I don't get to see him enough to get as smart as him! 15. My Grandparents are funny, when they bend over; you hear gas leaks, and they blame their dog. A man was sitting on a blanket at the beach. He had no arms and no legs. Three women were walking past and felt sorry for the poor man. The first woman said, 'Have you ever had a hug?' The man said, 'No,' so she gave him a hug and walked on. The second woman said, 'Have you ever had a kiss?' The man said, 'No,' so she gave him a kiss and walked on. The third woman came to him and said, 'Have you ever been f**ked?' The man broke into a big smile and said, 'No.' She said, 'You will be when the tide comes in.' Thetre you go then.

Proof reading is a dying art, wouldn't you say? Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter :-/ :-/ This one I caught in the SGV Tribune the other day and called the Editorial Room and asked who wrote this. It took two or three readings before the editor realized that what he was reading was impossible!!! They put in a correction the next day.. Then some more! I just couldn't help but send this along. Too funny not too eh! ;D ;D. Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says No crap, really? Ya think? ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers Now that's taking things a bit far! ----------------------------------------------------------- Miners Refuse to Work after Death No-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-so's! ------------------------------------------------------ Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant Let's see if that works any better than a fair trial eh! ---------------------- ------------------------------------ War Dims Hope for Peace I can see where it might have that effect! ---------------------------------------------------------------- If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile Ya think?! ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures Who would have thought! ---------------------------------------------------------------- Enfield ( London) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide They may be on to something! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges You mean there's something stronger than duct tape? ---------------------------------------------------------- Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge He probably IS the battery charge! ---------------------------------------------- New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group Weren't they fat enough?! :-/ ----------------------------------------------- Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft :B :B That's what he gets for eating those beans! ------------------------------------------------- Kids Make Nutritious Snacks Do they taste like chicken? **************************************** Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half Chainsaw Massacre all over again! *************************************************** Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors Boy, are they tall! ******************************************* And the winner is..... Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead Did I read that right! *************************************************** Now that you've smiled at least once, (maybe even a chuckle). We all need a good laugh, at least once a day!

A good honest post j.bamling. One that is as it should be, with an honest oppinion fair and straight. Wish more were the same.

' ............. acting like a Cock and making funny noises .... ' I remember them days only too well lol ;D ;D

A small zoo in Alabama obtained a very rare species of gorilla. Within a few weeks the gorilla, a female, became very difficult to handle. Upon examination, the veterinarian determined the problem. The gorilla was in heat. To make matters worse, there was no male gorilla available. Thinking about their problem, the Zoo Keeper thought of Bobby Lee Walton, a redneck part-time worker responsible for cleaning the animal cages. Bobby Lee, like most rednecks, had little sense but possessed ample ability to satisfy a female of any species. The Zoo Keeper thought they might have a solution. Bobby Lee was approached with a proposition. Would he be willing to mate with the gorilla for $500.00? Bobby Lee showed some interest, but said he would have to think the matter over carefully. The following day, he announced that he would accept their offer, but only under five conditions: "First", Bobby Lee said, "I ain't gonna kiss her on the lips." The Keeper quickly agreed to this condition. "Second", he said, "She must wear a 'Dale Earnhardt Forever' T-Shirt." The keeper again readily agreed to this condition. "Third", he said, "you can't never tell no one about this." The keeper again readily agreed to this condition. "Fourth", Bobby Lee said, "I want all the children raised Southern Baptist." Once again it was agreed. "And last," Bobby Lee said, "I'll need another week to come up with the $500.00 ."

There a bonus then gal! Needn't just come on here for a laugh now lol.

We all used to get a wheat / or barley or mix for the winter from the farmers. Some still do. I moved away, and then came back here like and don't know which ones do or don't. The fanciers ' nod nod wink wink scenario ;) and think they are clever. Some will fetch a little for another sometimes. After close seasons finishes you wouldn't believe the drival they spout about whos' was good or indifferent etc. Best is that they think they are clever. Then wonder why the lad or two won't be training their' birds in the coming season :-/ But I suppose I should get of me butt and phone a few farmers. The one I posted earlier is a Grain merchant and also a farmer. But sticks naturually with the Merchane prices.