Roland

Made me laugh seeing that he supposedly wrote a letter. Think he's trying to make out he can write the thick dicko lol On a good note a three game bann would be good.... would any manager be stupid enough to take a plonker that can't perform on the big stage to play just one game! I mean who would be left out? Walbeck? Sturridge etc. Johnson etc. etc. All who will have far out strip him as goal scorers by then!!! Gosh even Walcott tries at that level

Don't want no excuses if the Jocks wipe the floor with them lol. There may well be there to be beaten ... but make no mistake any side that does with have to give 110% and yes a little luck... But then every winner needs the fluke, or the ball to run for them at some stage. Would be over the moon if the jocks beat them.

I will be supporting Scotland like any good Brit will be. 'Come on you Jocks' What a result a win would be eh! And never say never! If the land of individuals play as a team, gell, what with their’ natural tenacious nature. If and Spain take their’ foot of the pedal - for they are in reality a first class act and as good as any team in the world - if not better at present, then yes there may well be a shock result. Here’s hoping!

Simple, East for wins, west for also rans. Wether club, section or National. Must be where the wind blows. That's whysome times it changes... wind or no wind full stop. The adage of 'One must try harder and be better' is purely rubbish spouted via those in favourable loft positions. If a goos flyer - with or without loft managers' pays the price, has good doo's and cares for then. He sends them in tip top condition. Full stop. No one birds can / or will be better, faster and fitter. One maybe a mite better fancier, but can't achieve the impossible. Yes one can't controll the wind ... adjust the sails mayhbe' but thgat won't mean the location will be bettered. Simple. Yes of course a good fancier will be a good fancier anywhere ... but you don't see many move West in club, Sections or Nations does one!

Have now put it into song lol. A catchy little ditty to brighten your day. Got to love an optimist..........................enjoy! Under a Scotsman's kilt - Click on the link below . . .. http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=MZ35SOU9HTM

100% correct ... It would be bad enough if the prima Donna ever turned in a a half decent performance, which of course he never has, let alone a good one! A touch of class, magic... well would be easier to pee in the Queens ear from 50 yards in a head wind than Rooney to have a incling of performing ... outside of the Brothal that is

11 eh! Must be a manager of Zimbabwe 4th division eh! NEVER EVER done anything for his country! JUST name a time when he has done a jot, worked a flanker, or been any good for England. Well as for comparing him to Beckham... that's a Joke. Beckham stood up to be counted. Scored IMPORTANT goals and fed, and made goals. Was inspirational to the team and fans alike. He wore his heart on his sleeve for COUNTRY besides his club unlike the *expletive removed* Rooney! Yes as a club player I'd have Rooney in my team any time... as for raising his game, trying, and even thinking for England level! Well he wouldn’t even be allowed to follow the coach in his Lambergenie. Fact is facts. He hasn't the mentality to be any good at national level. A waste of feeding him, let alone giving him space … Unless by himself in a dessert!

He won't be missed none, that's for sure.

Like I have so very often stated, he should never ever play for England! Rooney for England is a joke! A sad and very costly one to boot..., which he should have been booted out 3 -4 years back. Sending off, giving away ludicrous penalties, and ALWAYS under performing and never achieving in an English shirt. Many are such players! Great with club members that serve them well, but lack any thinking or control for themselves, and self esteem. Don't managers ever learn? Look at Barnes, one half decent game for England against Brazil... Was that a fluke One of the best club men of all time Dalglish. A great club player, yes undoubtedly world class... but only two half decent games for Scotland. How Shearer ever got back in and kept a shirt is beyond belief! Went 30 odd games never scoring. Time to forget 'Club' performances and have a side of thinkers and 100% triers as to Prima Donna's. Of course some cam compete at the highest level... Greaves and Linekar, Bremmer, Law, both Charltons etc. etc. Some like Rooney should be made to pay own fare and spectators fees if they want to watch. Lampard! No room for him ... etc. of course as a penalty player...

My neighbour found out that her dog (a Schnauzer) could hardly hear, so she took it to the veterinarian. The vet found that the problem was hair in the dog's ears. He cleaned both ears, and the dog could then hear fine. The vet then proceeded to tell the lady that, if she wanted to keep this from recurring, she should go to the chemist and get some "Nair" hair remover and rub it in the dog's ears once a month. The lady went to the chemist and bought some "Nair" hair remover. At the register, the pharmacist told her, "If you're going to use this under your arms, don't use deodorant for a few days." The lady said, "I'm not using it under my arms." The pharmacist said, "If you're using it on your legs, don't shave for a couple of days." The lady replied, "I'm not using it on my legs either. If you must know, I'm using it on my Schnauzer." The pharmacist says, "Well stay off your bicycle for about a week."

http://www.panoramas.dk/fullscreen2/full22.html Sorry try this one lol

I would like to say 'WELL DONE' Davey Flemmings in keeping the centre going. Too many times good idea's fall flat because of lack of 'Helpers' and the tailing of and excuse finding. I take my hat of to you for perseverance and for, by all accounts, doing a good Job! Be interesting to see if and when other areas follow suit, for this seems to be a very good success. Many the times I seen, even offered to help once or twice, where the setting up of such has floundered and never even got of the ground. Good also to see members helping in the 'Bringing and taking' and Well done to you others also. Well done!

http://www.panoramas.dk/fullscreen2/full22.html Last one dinnse work lol. Try this one.

DO you fart in bed? IF THIS STORY DOESN'T MAKE YOU CRY FOR LAUGHING SO HARD, LET ME KNOW AND I'LL PRAY FOR YOU. THIS IS A STORY ABOUT A COUPLE WHO HAD BEEN HAPPILY MARRIED FOR YEARS. THE ONLY FRICTION IN THEIR MARRIAGE WAS THE HUSBAND'S HABIT OF FARTING LOUDLY EVERY MORNING WHEN HE AWOKE. THE NOISE WOULD WAKE HIS WIFE AND THE SMELL WOULD MAKE HER EYES WATER AND MAKE HER GASP FOR AIR. EVERY MORNING SHE WOULD PLEAD WITH HIM TO STOP RIPPING THEM OFF BECAUSE IT WAS MAKING HER SICK. HE TOLD HER HE COULDN'T STOP IT AND THAT IT WAS PERFECTLY NATURAL. SHE TOLD HIM TO SEE A DOCTOR, SHE WAS CONCERNED THAT ONE DAY HE WOULD BLOW HIS GUTS OUT. THE YEARS WENT BY AND HE CONTINUED TO RIP THEM OUT. THEN ONE CHRISTMAS DAY MORNING, AS SHE WAS PREPARING THE TURKEY FOR DINNER AND HE WAS UPSTAIRS SOUND ASLEEP, SHE LOOKED AT THE INNARDS, NECK, GIZZARD, LIVER AND ALL THE SPARE PARTS, A MALICIOUS THOUGHT CAME TO HER. SHE TOOK THE BOWL AND WENT UPSTAIRS WHERE HER HUSBAND WAS SOUND ASLEEP AND, GENTLY PULLING THE BED COVERS BACK, SHE PULLED BACK THE ELASTIC WAISTBAND OF HIS UNDERPANTS AND EMPTIED THE BOWL OF TURKEY GUTS INTO HIS SHORTS.. SOME TIME LATER SHE HEARD HER HUSBAND WAKEN WITH HIS USUAL TRUMPETING WHICH WAS FOLLOWED BY A BLOOD CURDLING SCREAM AND THE SOUND OF FRANTIC FOOT STEPS AS HE RAN INTO THE BATH ROOM. SHE COULD HARDLY CONTROL HERSELF AS SHE ROLLED ON THE FLOOR LAUGHING, TEARS IN HER EYES! AFTER YEARS OF TORTURE SHE RECKONED SHE HAD GOT HIM BACK PRETTY GOOD. ABOUT TWENTY MINUTES LATER, HER HUSBAND CAME DOWNSTAIRS IN HIS BLOODSTAINED UNDERPANTS WITH A LOOK OF HORROR ON HIS FACE. SHE BIT HER LIP AS SHE ASKED HIM WHAT WAS THE MATTER. HE SAID, 'HONEY YOU WERE RIGHT. ALL THESE YEARS YOU HAVE WARNED ME AND I DIDN'T LISTEN TO YOU'. 'WHAT DO YOU MEAN?' ASKED HIS WIFE. 'WELL, YOU ALWAYS TOLD ME THAT ONE DAY I WOULD END UP FARTING MY GUTS OUT, AND TODAY IT FINALLY HAPPENED. BUT BY THE GRACE OF GOD, WITH SOME VASELINE AND TWO FINGERS. I THINK I GOT MOST OF THEM BACK IN

Don't for a moment think the cost of a loft is much. Nothing like the prices advertised! Yes of the 'Built' and over inflated price of wooden ones maybe, understandably. But when a frame is covered via plastic, and a wire roof under a false roof. When sliding doors are used... well the reality is that it is a fraction of the costs. Maybe my son -in - law would make them up... a Darn good chippie who has built some cracking stables at a very good price indeed. Maybe - like mine - some would have wooden perches and nest boxes. But again these aren't really dear if one makes them up. JMO. Other than that I think that Gareth Rankin has made a valid and very good point.

If you had been paying attention to theses cracks earlier you would not have this serious problem Getting rid of both of them could save you money in the long run Yep, guess that would have 'Cracked' it lol

Great gesture, and great looking bird. Well done.

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to the Tesco Store. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Tesco: Dear Mrs. Harris, Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behaviour and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Harris, are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras: 1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking. 2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5-minute intervals. 3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom. 4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in House wares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money. 5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway. 6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged. 8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called. 9.. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose. 10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were. 11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the ' Mission Impossible' theme. 12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels. 13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!' 14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!' And last, but not least: 15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the clerks passed out.

Letter to a men's helpline... Hi Bob, I really need your advice on a serious problem: I have suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me. The usual signs: if the phone rings and I answer, the caller hangs up; she goes out with the girls a lot. I try to stay awake to look out for her when she comes home but I usually fall asleep. Anyway last night about midnight I hid in the shed behind the boat. When she came home she got out of someone's car buttoning her blouse, then she took her panties out of her purse and slipped them on. It was at that moment crouched behind the boat that I noticed a hairline crack in the outboard engine mounting bracket. Is that something I can weld or do I need to replace the whole bracket?

Without tempting fate, I believe likewise Frank. Scotland over the centuries have been a very good tenacious nation... Individually that is. In all sports ands walks of life I believe - genuinely - that 'Scotland the Brave' was very apt indeed when sang. Yes there have been the odd 'Side / Team that have clicked and gelled to great success granted, but mostly they have a team of great individuals. I have had tears in my eyes cheering myself hoarse over some of these. Fact that! Liz McColgan performances achieved IS SURELY as good as any English man 9Not better lol) or woman. Over shadowing another great Scottish lass in Yvonne Murry… as so often the case when a great rises above the norm. Alan Well superb, and pushed by 2 –3 other great Scottish sprinters.. the Stewart Family eh! Ian eh! How he and another Scottish team mate Ian McCafferty upstaged Kip Kieno, TWICE.. Stewart won the bronze medal in the Men's 5000 metres at the 1972 Summer Olympics in Munich (a race won by Lasse Virén). Stewart also won the following championships: European 5,000 metres (1969), Commonwealth 5,000 metres (1970), European Indoor (1969 and 1975) and World Cross Country (1975). His Brother Peter, sister Mary were only slightly over shadowed, but then again most in the world were. There are so man, in so many sports, Boxing, Cycling etc. etc. Yep a proud and nigh endless list. Yet outside of Jock Steins Celtic European winning side, where they were all born within 20 miles of each other, and curling, one has to struggle even for the swallow that never makes the summer.

Oh woe is thee.... Soss Jocks! I think we would have to let you beat us 123 to nil to see yous through now... Just canne do... So Sorry, so sad.... Heres a kiss X and a wave good bye Might let you win and show a little restrain .. and have a better foe in the next round... France would do us nicely. Seems whoever wins between us and New Zealand will probably win the Cup.

Nah... I think he's swallowed that!

: Fail... well at least we enter and put a fight up ... not just lay down like yous. WE turn up! .... And always progress further - out side of twice at footie -in the last 120 odd years lol

There, and we English were thinking of - as usual - letting the Scots beat us to enable them to qualify after they get beat again today. But then of course the point structure / bonus points etc. would render that a futile hope. And you call us 'Old Farts. Gosh! :emoticon... Still when yet again nothing to shout about you go back to doing what you do so well after all the years of practise you've had... Abusing and trying to belittle and drag your betters down eh! Don't think I dare watch, even the highlights, today TO SEES yous fail miserably YET once again. On a serious note though I, like most Englishmen, would love to sees yous beat them and will be routing for yers. Goog luck ... as disdained and fruitile that may wll be.