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Posted
Why not do what Eggy did at my Best Friend's Wedding a few years ago.

He Dutifully sat through the Service and even managed to impatiently make it through the Main course of the Meal - then b******d off back to Gala saying he would be back if he got a timer...........................luckily for him he did and Boy did he do some catching up in the Drink Dept  ;D ;D ;D

 

Classic ;D ;D

 

Oops got to go on to a different topic now.......I can hear the wife coming in ??) ??) ;)

 

 

Guest bigda
Posted

or you could say  you have left your wallet at home they'll hunt yea  ;D then

Posted

tell her you,ve got a doze of the runs and got to go home and stay at home until she starts phoning the mobile slip the bairns a couple of quid and tell them to keep mam up on the dance floor and dad will be back when its dark. ;D ;D

Posted
tell her you,ve got a doze of the runs and got to go home and stay at home until she starts phoning the mobile slip the bairns a couple of quid and tell them to keep mam up on the dance floor and dad will be back when its dark. ;D ;D

 

I'm spoiled for choice lad's , some crackers there ;)

 

keep em coming

 

 

Guest 67ghirl
Posted

I always thought a Man's main trick was to create a huge argument before you leave the house resulting in a 'well that's it I'm not going anywhere with you!'

Posted
  as long as its not at my door  :) :) :)am not ready to go yet  8) anyway geraldy making my coffin  ;)

 

 

They'll maybe make you a box Stevie, but they'll no plug you up ??) ??) :X :X :X

 

Guest Denny
Posted

Starting eating loads and loads just before getting dressed in your sunday best, just enough so that your trousers don't fit and you can't wear anything but your trackie bottoms, you know the ones with the elastic waist band - no trousers no wedding!

Posted

Tell your wife someone has just phoned and offered you a huge sum of money to buy all your pigeons. The offer is a life-changing amount but he insists on seeing them straight away and the offer is only valid today. You could promise the wife a nice holiday out of it.You have to go to the loft to meet him and his lawyer and draw up a bill of sale. When you got there you waited for a while, he was obviously late. You started to worry it was all a hoax, but he called to say the Rolls-Royce had broken down but he was getting someone to pick him up in his helicopter and bring him over. He finally arrived hours later (problems getting the helicopter started) and looked at the birds. He then decided that they were not really what he was after and the deal fell through. Oh well some you win some you lose. Should get you back in time for last orders.  ;)

 

Paul.

Posted
Tell your wife someone has just phoned and offered you a huge sum of money to buy all your pigeons. The offer is a life-changing amount but he insists on seeing them straight away and the offer is only valid today. You could promise the wife a nice holiday out of it.You have to go to the loft to meet him and his lawyer and draw up a bill of sale. When you got there you waited for a while, he was obviously late. You started to worry it was all a hoax, but he called to say the Rolls-Royce had broken down but he was getting someone to pick him up in his helicopter and bring him over. He finally arrived hours later (problems getting the helicopter started) and looked at the birds. He then decided that they were not really what he was after and the deal fell through. Oh well some you win some you lose. Should get you back in time for last orders.  ;)

 

Paul.

 

Another beauty ;D I knew us pigeon guys would be great at making up excuses even to ourselves when the birds don't perform, it'salway's someone elses fault ;D ;D :X

 

 

Posted

Stewart are you a man or a mouse  just tell her straight i am racing and i am not going  end of   i never went to my brothers years ago and my mrs and mum went cracklers  and all i said was 2 reasons not going 1 birds are racing 2nd  dont like the *expletive removed*  end of  no more hassle  

Posted
I  think I have found a solution to keep all parties happy. As the hotel is 2 mins from my loft, I fear I could be nipping outside for a lot of smoking breaks and will drive to the loft for a quick look and back to the hotel again. They won't even know I'm gone ;) ;) ;D

 

Will they really miss you   lol

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