Fred and Tam in the local pub for their usual Friday pint. Fred had a badly withered arm, Tam has a large hump on his back that makes him walk badly doubled over. Tam tells Fred " a need to get hame quick the night, the wife's gone daft at how late av'e been in the pub lately, in fact am gone tae take a short cut through the graveyard, it will take 10 minutes aff the journey" Fred tells Tam "yer on your own, no way would I set foot in that place, ye ken it's haunted!!" Tam need'n tae be hame in a hurry shuffles off through the grave yard, after a couple of minutes a ghostly figure jumps out from behind a grave stone and points to Tams back "whit's that" it asks, Tam replies " ma hump" the ghost says " a'll hae that" and grabs it off Tam's back before disappearing. Following week Tam meets back up with Fred and Fred is amazed at the difference in Tam and the fact he can now stand up straight, Tam tells him about his ghostly encounter and how it's a miracle and he has never felt so good. Fred, shitting himself, decides that if it a miracle can happen to Tam then it might work for him and his withered arm, so he decides to take the short cut through the grave yard. After a couple of minutes this ghostly figures appears from behind a grave stone and shouts at Fred " whit's that on yer back?" Fred says "nothing" the ghost then shouts " WELL HERE'S A HUMP"