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Upon arriving home, a husband was met at the door by his sobbing wife.

 

Tearfully she explained,

 

"It's the chemist. He insulted me terribly this morning on the phone.

 

I had to call multiple times before he would even answer the phone."

 

Immediately, the husband drove downtown to confront the chemist and

 

demand an apology.

 

Before he could say more than a word or two, the chemist told him,

 

"Now, just a minute, listen to my side of it. This morning the alarm

 

failed to go off, so I was late getting up. I went without breakfast

 

and hurried out to the car, just to realize that I'd locked the house with

 

both house and car keys inside and had to break a window to get my keys.

 

"Then, driving a little too fast, I got a speeding ticket. Later, when

 

I was about three blocks from the store, I had a flat tyre."

 

 

"When I finally got to the store a bunch of people were waiting for me

to open up.

 

I got the store opened and started waiting on these people, all the

time the darn phone was ringing off the hook."

 

He continued, "Then I had to break a roll of coins against the cash

 

register drawer to make change, and they spilled all over the floor.

 

I had to get down on my hands and knees to pick up the coins and

 

the phone was still ringing..

 

When I came up I cracked my head on the open cash drawer, which made

 

me stagger back against a showcase with a bunch of perfume bottles on it.

 

Half of them hit the floor and broke."

 

"Meanwhile, the phone is still ringing with no let up, and I finally got

 

back to answer it. It was your wife. She wanted to know how to use a

 

rectal thermometer.

 

And believe me sir, as God is my witness, all I did was tell her."

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