adorable

[Roland]

This is adorable.

 

Baby's First Doctor Visit .

 

A woman and a baby were in the doctor's examining room, Waiting for the doctor to come in for the baby's first exam. The doctor arrived, and examined the baby, checked his weight, and being a little concerned, asked if the baby was breast-fed or bottle-fed. 'Breast-fed,' she replied. 'Well, strip down to your waist,' the doctor ordered. She did. He pinched her nipples, pressed, kneaded, and rubbed both breasts for a while in a very professional and detailed examination. Motioning to her to get dressed, the doctor said, 'No wonder this baby is underweight. You don't have any milk.' I know,' she said, 'I'm his Grandma, But I'm glad I came.'

 

 

He said to me . . . I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.

I said to him . . . You wear pants don't you?

 

He said to me . . ..... Shall we try swapping positions tonight?

She said, That's a good idea - you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart!

 

He said to me. ... What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?

I said to him. .....Turn sideways and look in the mirror!

 

He said to me. ..... Why don't women blink during foreplay?

I said to him.. . They don't have time

 

He said to me. . How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?

I said to him .. . We don't know; it has never happened.

 

He said to me. . Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and Good- looking?

I said to him . . . They already have boyfriends.

 

I said...What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?

He said. . . A widow.

 

He said to me . .. . Why are married women heavier than single women?

I said to him . . . Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.

 

SEND THIS TO A SMART WOMAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH AND TO THE GUYS YOU THINK CAN HANDLE IT!

 

BUYINGViagra

An old man goes into a drug store to buy some Viagra.

'Can I have 6 tablets, cut in quarters?'

'I can cut them for you' said Dan the pharmacist ' But a quarter tablet will not give you a full erection. '

'I am 96' said the old man 'I don't want an erection.

I just want it sticking out far enough so I don't p*ss on my slippers.'

 

[Guest 67ghirl]

(evil)(evil)

 

Oh I do like reading something that makes me snigger!

[REDCHEQHEN]

(evil)(evil)(evil)(evil)

[Merlin]

Top class again Roland ;D ;D ;D ;D