Very Quiet ?

[greenlands]

So I hope these few make you smile.

From my mate in Auz.Des.

 

The Grim Reaper came for me last night, and I beat him off with a vacuum cleaner. Talk about Dyson with death.

 

A mate of mine recently admitted to being addicted to brake fluid. When I quizzed him on it he reckoned he could stop any time....

 

I went to the cemetery yesterday to lay some flowers on a grave. As I was standing there I noticed four grave diggers walking about with a coffin. Three hours later and they're still walking about with it. I thought to myself, they've lost the plot!!

 

My daughter asked me for a pet spider for her birthday, so I went to our local pet shop and they were £50!!! Blow this, I thought, I can get one cheaper off the web.

 

I was at an ATM yesterday when a little old lady asked if I could check her balance, so I pushed her over.

 

I start a new job in Seoul next week. I thought it was a good Korea move.

 

I was driving this morning when I saw an AA van parked. The driver was sobbing uncontrollably and looked very miserable. I thought to myself that guy's heading for a breakdown.

 

Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarves are not Happy.

 

My neighbour knocked on my door at 2:30am this morning, can you believe that, 2:30am?! Luckily for him I was still up playing my Bagpipes.

 

Just put the last one in for you Scottish lads.

 

Lindsay.

 

:animatedpigeons: :animatedpigeons:

[buster151]

:emoticon-0137-clapping:

[andy Burgess]