naughty joke...

[Guest strapper]

whats big long and hard when erect, and makes a woman moan like hell..................

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

an ironing board! ;D ;D ;D ;D

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[demolition man]

;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

[grizzal]

;D ;D ;Dgood one

[Guest devonred]

Cracker, even the missus agrees ;D ;D ;D

[Guest grizzler]

c,mon we need some more  jokes :)

[HOMERp]

An Englishman and a Scotsman are driving head on, at night, on a twisty, dark road.

Both are driving too fast for the conditions and collide on a sharp bend in the road.

 

To the amazement of both, they are unscathed, though their cars are both destroyed.

In celebration of their luck, both agree to put aside their dislike for the other from that moment on.

 

At this point, the Scotsman goes to the boot and fetches a 12 year old bottle of sherry. He hands the bottle to the Englishman, whom exclaims " May the Scots and the English live together forever, in peace, and harmony".

 

The Englishman then tips the bottle and gulps half of the bottle down.

Still flabbergasted over the whole thing, he goes to hand the bottle to the Scotsman, whom replies:

"No, thanks, I'll just wait till the Police git here". . ;D. ;D. ;D

[Guest wattle]

whats big hard and hairy and full of juice.

 

 

a coconut

[Guest Freebird]

Local postman is doing his rounds on his birthday. Happy birthday says the housewife as she invites him in. She takes him up to the bedroom and gives him a good time. After this she hands him a fiver and says I'll cook ye a good fry-up for breakfast. The postie can't believe his luck and finally plucks up the courage to ask why he is getting this SPECIAL treatment. The housewife replies, "Well, I asked my man what I should get the postie for his birthday" and he said " um, give um a fiver " The breakfast was my idea though.(evil)(evil)(evil)

[Guest grizzler]

why do women have small feet?? so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink :)

[pigeonpete]

whats big long and hard when erect, and makes a woman moan like hell..................

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

an ironing board! ;D ;D ;D ;D

 

oh dear !!  ;D

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Guest bakes]

roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in a zoo dont be mad ill be there to not in cage but waveing at you  

[Guest Freebird]

Local postman is doing his rounds on his birthday. Happy birthday says the housewife as she invites him in. She takes him up to the bedroom and gives him a good time. After this she hands him a fiver and says I'll cook ye a good fry-up for breakfast. The postie can't believe his luck and finally plucks up the courage to ask why he is getting this SPECIAL treatment. The housewife replies, "Well, I asked my man what I should get the postie for his birthday" and he said " um, give um a fiver " The breakfast was my idea though.(evil)(evil)(evil)

Revised to totally render the joke useless. Where it says "um" you need to insert the "f" word. Yawn! Yawn! Yawn! Never mind, there I've revised it properly  (hehe)(hehe)(hehe)

[pigeonpete]

Revised to totally render the joke useless. Where it says "um" you need to insert the "f" word. Yawn! Yawn! Yawn! Never mind, there I've revised it properly  (hehe)(hehe)(hehe)

 

wonder who did that  

[Guest Freebird]

 

wonder who did that  

 

Pete, heres one for you and it's meant to be true! (that rhymes)

During her driving test, the examiner asks the learner "Give me an example of a road sign you would encounter in the countryside" answer, "Pick your own strawberries"

Or Not true (mmmmh)

Examiner "why do you keep opening the door" answer "To let the clutch out"

Please don't remove the critical words, Eh!!!! He He He!

 

 

[pigeonpete]

 

Pete, heres one for you and it's meant to be true! (that rhymes)

During her driving test, the examiner asks the learner "Give me an example of a road sign you would encounter in the countryside" answer, "Pick your own strawberries"

Or Not true (mmmmh)

Examiner "why do you keep opening the door" answer "To let the clutch out"

Please don't remove the critical words, Eh!!!! He He He!

 

 

;D ;D ;D must have been many moons ago, as examiner would not ask the candidate anything about roadsigns now :-)

 

have had 1 or 2 strange comments of pupils myself :-)  ;D

 

 

[hotrod]

the kosovan's have withdrawn from the olympics because their high diving team forgot to use a pool while practising in springburn glasgow .