Roland

Yep, creepy nasties certainly get inside ythe straw tubing ... big trouble unless one treats well before use.

Remember when Dad just nailed a load of old bits of wood together. Look like a blumming hedgehog lol. Spent real good times with it... was a hedgehog, a deadly tank / destruction space ship, a wierld animal... any and everything I wanted it to be... and great friend to kill lonely hours when brothers etc. weren't around.

And me I hope ! ... My thoughts were with you ... and it is the thoughts that count lol ;) :P ;D ;D ;D, P.s Am particial to single malt whisky lol ;D

A Poll! The most irritating git! Now I'd put me name down for this if anyone feels like nominating me lol ;D ;D As I can't vote for myself, I will have to think long and hard about this .... there are so many prime choices lol. Now just got to sort out the prize I guess. P.s. Any one not wishing to be considered, squark now, or forever hold you piece lol

Postman Pats Last Day at Work It was Postman Pat's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same villages and towns. When he arrived at the first house on his route, he was greeted by the whole family there, who all hugged and congratulated him and sent him on his way with a cheque for £50. At the second house they presented him an 18-carat gold watch. The folks at the third house handed him a bottle of 15-year old Scotch whisky, single malt at that! At the fourth house he was met at the door by a dumb brunette in her lingerie. She took him by the arm and led him up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate love he had ever experienced. When they went downstairs, the brunette fixed him a full English breakfast: bacon, eggs, sausage & tomato with freshly squeezed orange juice. As she was pouring him a cup of steaming coffee, he noticed a £5 note sticking out from under the cup. 'All this was just too wonderful for words,' he said, 'but what's the five quid for?' 'Well,' said the dumb brunette , 'Last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day and that we should do something special for you'. 'I asked him what I should give you'. He said, 'expletive removed* him. Give him a fiver.' She smiled shyly and said, 'The breakfast was my idea.'

Was - as I have posted, pigeonscout the same for me when I started up on my own. Got shot of the goats, and a pigeon settled flown out. Misses was intrigued. Said get you to losing i ... which it did of course clear shortly when recuperated. Told misses I was starting up a pigeon loft. Tried the wedge 'Well you can do both, show fish etc. and have pigeons Nag bah nag nag blah codswallop. Had 17 tanks, was tip top class 90% of them Built up ducking and diving, swapping etc. and moved big time into lake Malawi and Tangeniksa, some tiddlers (Electra Blues for instance) I had paid £150 each and had them in nines. So I phoned the sec and said any one want anything to come... they ascended like locaust and stripped them bear in side a two days. Tanks, pumps etc. etc. and never as much as even offered the kids a sweet.... Misses right peeved.... Did right, got devoiced 4 years later ;D ;D

hAVE POSTED BEFORE, BUT i LIKE IT LOL WHO IS JACK SCHITT? For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt? We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, 'You don't know Jack Schitt'! Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an intellectual way. Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, who married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack. In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt.. The deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against her parents objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout. After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock, and because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt Sherlock. Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt. Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Horse. Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt. Now when someone says, 'You don't know Jack Schitt', you can correct them. Sincerely, Crock O. Schitt NOTE: PLEASE PASS THIS ON TO ANYONE WHO NEEDS A LAUGH. REMEMBER: LAUGHING LOWERS THE BLOOD PRESSURE. Subject: FW: THE AMISH AND THE ELEVATORii THE AMISH AND THE ELEVATOR An Amish boy and his father were in a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again. The boy asked, 'What is this, Father?' The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, 'Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is.' While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat, old lady in a wheel chair moved up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched the small circular numbers above the walls light up sequentially. They continued to watch until it reached the last number and then the numbers began to light in the reverse order. Finally the walls opened up again and a gorgeous, 24-year-old blonde stepped out. The father said quietly to his son..... 'Go get your mother.'

Is there one... :-/ even more than one :P ;D ;D Yes there have been more than a few great Great' distance fanciers from Scotland.

Good luck with you future mucker... always keep doors ajar, try never to burn a brigde and drop in from time to time.

FAIRY TALE One day, a long, long time ago, there lived a woman who did not whine, nag nor *expletive removed*. ..................................................... ............................................................. But that was a long time ago, and it was just that one day. The End

Yep.... his spelling lol ;D ;D ;D

Hope no one thought that I was saying that the offer wasn't anything but genuine.

Was possible to track the from the races 15 years ago or more. Two downers were (then) the cost and the size. Both of course improved a lot since... who knows whether it will ever catch on big time... No doubt some will soon, those able to afford etc. Be nice up the pub and seeing 10 minutes expected arrival time... so if one can be arsed, suppose they caould nip back and watch the ET timer do it's job ;D

It's a hen! :P ;D ;D ;D ;D

> Tickle Me Elmo: There is a factory in Northern Minnesota, which makes the Tickle Me Elmo toys. The toy laughs when you tickle It under the arms. Well, Lena is hired at The Tickle Me Elmo factory and she reports for her first day promptly at 8:00 AM. The next day at 8:45 AM there is a knock at the Personnel Manager's door. The Foreman throws Open the door and begins to rant about the new Employee. He complains that she is incredibly slow and the whole Line is backing up, putting the entire production line Behind schedule. The Personnel Manager decides he should see this for Himself, so the 2 men march down to the factory floor. When they get there the line is so backed up that there Are Tickle Me Elmo's all over the factory floor and they're Really beginning to pile up. At the end of the line stands Lena surrounded by mountains Of Tickle Me Elmo's. She has a roll of plush Red fabric and a huge bag of small marbles. The 2 men watch in amazement as she cuts a little piece Of fabric, wraps it around two marbles and begins to Carefully sew the little package between Elmo's legs. The Personnel Manager bursts into laughter. After several minutes of hysterics he pulls himself Together and approaches Lena. "I'm sorry," he says to her, barely able to keep a straight face, "but I think you misunderstood the instructions I gave you Yesterday..." "Your job is to give Elmo two test tickles. If you don't send this to five friends right away, There will be five fewer people laughing in the world! PS WHERE IS SHIKITOH (MUALI) THESE DAYS A woman goes into Bass Pro Shop to buy a rod and reel for her grandson's birthday. She doesn't know which one to get so she just grabs one and goes over to the counter. A Bass Pro Shop associate is standing there wearing dark shades. She says, 'Excuse me, sir. Can you tell me anything about this rod and reel?' He says, 'Ma'am, I'm completely blind; but if you'll drop it on the counter, I can tell you everything from the sound it makes.' She doesn't believe him but drops it on the counter anyway. He says, 'That's a six-foot Shakespeare graphite rod with a Zebco 404 reel and 10-LB. Test line. It's a good all around combination and it's on sale this week for only £20.00. 'It's amazing that you can tell all that just by the sound of it dropping on the counter', she says. I'll take it!' As she opens her purse, her credit card drops on the floor. 'Oh, that sounds like a Master Card,' he says. She bends down to pick it up and accidentally farts. At first she is really embarrassed, but then realizes there is no way the blind clerk could tell it was she who tooted. Being blind, he wouldn't know that she was the only person around. The clerk rings up the sale and says, 'That'll be £34.50 please.' The woman is totally confused by this and asks, 'Didn't you tell me the rod and reel were on sale for £20.00? How did you get £34.50?' He replies, 'Yes, ma'am. The rod and reel is £20.00, but the Duck Call is £11.00 and the Bull Repellent is £3.50.' A young Canadian soldier was attending some college courses between assignments . He had also completed missions in Afghanistan. One of the courses had a professor who was a vowed atheist. One day the professor shocked the class when he came in. He Looked to the ceiling and flatly stated, 'God, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I'll give you exactly 15 minutes.' The lecture room fell silent. You could hear a pin drop. Ten minutes went by and the professor proclaimed, 'Here I am God. I'm still waiting.' It got down to the last couple of minutes when the young soldier got out of his Chair, went up to the professor, and cold-cocked him; knocking him off the platform. The professor was out cold. The young man went back to his seat and sat there, silently. The other students were shocked and stunned and sat there looking on in silence. The professor eventually came to, noticeably shaken, looked at the soldier and asked, 'What the hell is the matter with! You? Why did you do that?' Came the reply, 'God was too busy today protecting our soldiers who are protecting your right to talk stupid and act like an ass @#$e. So, He sent me'

Like the sense of humour there ... Obviously tongue in cheek though ... NO one can be that bad! lol ;D ;D ;D Loverly offer mate though. Tiles are around the 50p each for starters. Sorry to hear the PFL has claimed another. Best wishes in everything for the future though!

Went to London to visit an uncle, my Dad's sister. Was put on the train at Kettering and they picked me up at St. Pancress. He was a top fancier, done exceptionally well from Barcelona etc. 1953. Fell in love with the matelica necks. - I love all birds, animals. Pester me dad to no avail. Then two years later the family all went up London. My elder brother, dads favourite also wanted them when he saw them... Took three pairs home. Collected some more off the train the following April. The rest is history.

It is a shame Stu! Another fine gesture tarnish by illiterate selfish inadequate motives. Could it be that because that they have an inferior complex – and possibly rightly so – feeling that they aren’t in with a realistic shout, hence they have to boo - hoo it!? Though I – as stated first of, like a couple of others, - that I wished not to be consider, for said reason stated, I still have an interest in ‘Posters’ views and why. Further, a class prize is up for grabs kindly donated via you Stu! So personally I think that some should shut up and let things be. Credit where credit is due, well done Stu, and if you did with draw this offer Your name will have already had the deserved credit bestowed upon it!

Normally never more than 24, at a push. This year, well who knows, have some stock birds - which normally never had till a couple last season. But will breed a round of the race team = 20, then 10 off a mix, 5 stock cocks to 5 racing hens. Then a couple off the 8 stock pairs left 32. Golly 62 all going well. That's 3 times more than needed normally. But there you go! Will be raced on both the North and the South, mostly altenative weeks, depending what race and what I think is best suit condition wise. - Trained. 4 tosses 20 - 30 miles in 4 directions. about 7 to 10 days before the first race. Then most days 20 miles alternative directions.

Nah ... Just makes them feel important lol ;D ;D ;D

90% managerment, and 10% a GOOD pigeon!

Yep a good job and very practical and sensible loft, in more ways than one. I always advocate that folks go to a demolishon site, and you we get a lot of good stuff next to nowt. Have built 3 like that. One was ock beans a Red Cedar, and another a lot of pine... all for next to nowt... Now I advocate that you just make a framework, bolted is best, than cover all over, sides roof etc. with wire mesh (1/2 inch) off the ground of course, on bricks, kerbs, anything stable that won't rot. And wire that in too so nowt can get under. Sliding doors. Then a false roof sloping down to the front, that is a foot alround bigger. THEN SIDES I have interchanging vents, which I swap easierly for Plastic cladding. Nice and airy, and water proof, and practical.

Perhaps one ought to take stock and revaluate what is being posted. I.B. for instance, it is all very well searching the net and copying, then pasting things for all to read. 995 of us don't even understand the gist, let alone the meaning and certainly not the very basis and fundemental of what is written ... and one would find it very hard, time consuming - why folks spend years at Uni or labs learning! Indeed I.B no disrespect, but do you actually and really understand any of the things you find and paste? It would take yonks of years for the layman. Here is what a very good Vet / Doc posted me, and I believe this puts it in a nut shell for all to understand ... whether one wants to believe or not, or even act, is obviously another matter. This is part of the reply..... As for Paratyphus I know some will say it is controversial but cull is the only way to eradicate it in a loft. Personally I feel that injection is just another way to make money. We have a guy here working on salmonella in Chickens, and he told me that it needs to be a live vaccine for the variant of salmonella you got. How many actually know they have salmonella and how many think they got it. Its pointless guessing. I feel all this illness is a mutation of PMV as paratyphus will affect the breeding first. How many get good hatches birds go sick and they become a vet and say its paratyphus. You are doing everything right, my source says sanitation is the best way in combating salmonella. A little bleach in the drinker or virkon will kill it in your own loft as will washing the loft out regulary. End of ............................................................. he also asked why do people jab, to prevent, or use antibiotics for a Virus .... Indeed what viagrant / strain are they inoculating against? Then different species have different Viarants again ...