In the Barbers shop

[Roland]

John McCain and Barack Obama somehow ended up at the same barber shop. As they

sat there, each being worked on by a different barber, not a word was spoken.

  The barbers were both afraid to start a conversation, for fear it would turn to politics. As the barbers finished their shaves, the one who had McCain in his chair reached for the after shave. McCain was quick to stop him saying, ' No thanks, my wife Cindy will smell that and think I've been in a whorehouse'.      

The second barber turned to Barack and said 'how about you?'   Obama replied 'Go ahead, my wife Michelle doesn't know what the inside of a whorehouse smells like!

 

 

      It was Postman Pat's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same villages and towns.

When he arrived at the first house on his route, the whole family there, who all hugged and congratulated him and sent him on his way with a cheque for £50,after greeting him.

 

At the second house they presented him an 18-carat gold watch.

 

The folks at the third house handed him a bottle of 15-year old Scotch whisky.

 

At the fourth house a dumb brunette in her lingerie met him at the door. She took him by the arm and led him up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate love he had ever experienced. When they went downstairs, the brunette fixed him a full English breakfast: bacon, eggs, sausage & tomato with freshly squeezed orange juice. As she was pouring him a cup of steaming coffee, he noticed a £5 note sticking out from under the cup.

 

'All this was just too wonderful for words,' he said, 'but what's the five quid for?'

 

'Well,' said the dumb brunette, 'Last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day and that we should do something special for you'. 'I asked him what I should give you'.

 

He said, 'expletive removed* him. Give him a fiver.'

 

She smiled shyly and said, 'The breakfast was my idea.'