rab is one of the most helpfull guys on this forum i met him at blackpool when i was starting up a true gent,im sure your club mates would miss you,we all would.
i am sorry to hear about your mom,my mother died recently so i no what your going through.
but i agree with paul ,would your mother want you to pack up a sport which she saw you have such fun and enjoyment,take time and think it through mate
all the best