Ventriloquist

[DOVEScot]

An Australian ventriloquist visiting Wales walks into a small village called Caldicots and sees a local sitting on his veranda patting his dog.

 

    

 

He figures he'll have a little fun, so he says to Chris

 

    

 

'G'day, mind if I talk to your dog?'

 

Chris: 'The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Aussie.'

 

Ventriloquist: 'Hello dog, how's it going mate?'  

 

Dog: 'Yeah, doin' all right.'  

 

Chris: (look of extreme shock)  

 

Ventriloquist: 'Is this villager your owner?' (pointing at Chris)     

 

Dog: 'Yep.'

 

Ventriloquist: 'How does he treat you?'  

 

Dog: 'Yeah, real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food And  takes me to the lake once a week to play.'

 

Chris: (look of utter disbelief)  

 

Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your horse?'  

 

Chis: 'Uh, the horse doesn't talk either... I think.'

 

Ventriloquist: 'Hey horse, how's it going?'  

 

Horse: 'Cool.'

 

Chris: (absolutely dumbfounded)  

 

Ventriloquist: 'Is this your owner?' (Pointing at Chris)  

 

Horse: 'Yep.'

 

Ventriloquist: 'How does he treat you?'  

 

Horse: 'Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes  me down often and keeps me in the shed  to protect me from the elements.'  

 

Chris: (total look of amazement)  

 

Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your sheep?'  

 

Chris: (in a panic) 'The sheep's a   f*****' liar......!!'  

 

 

 

 

[Guest spin cycle]

(evil)(evil)(evil)(evil)(evil)(evil)

[Guest bigda]

;D  :Xtee hee

[tippler1]

nice one lol

[ChrisMaidment08]

theres four peaple here fed pres sec  nat chairman and mate plus sons im sorry but we cant stop laughing dov youer one funnny man :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(

[DOVEScot]

theres four peaple here fed pres sec  nat chairman and mate plus sons im sorry but we cant stop laughing dov youer one funnny man :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(